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Showing posts from October, 2012

The Secret Language of Women -- Keywords and Their Meaning

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1)Fine: This is the word a woman uses at the end of any argument in which she feels she is right about but needs to shut you up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments. 2)Five Minutes: This is really half an hour. It is equivalent to the same "five minutes" that a football game is going to last before you take out the garbage. 3)Nothing: This really means, "You'd never understand." "Nothing" is usually accompanied by a woman's desire to turn you inside out, upside-down, and backwards. "Nothing" is often said prior to an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and will end with the word "Fine." 4)Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is not permission. This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine. 5)Go Ahead (with normal eyebrows): This means, "…

"Tan's Tale" -Sallah Day Special

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The clock is ticking, the time is drawing near Day break and night fall, the days pass by. I used to live in a whole yard in freedom, now am bound, tied down in this boredom. Now I understand why Gam pretended to be sick, its now so clear to me, he did want to leave the pen. He was fit just seconds before they appeared, it puzzled me to see him change immediately he saw the guests. Lucky Gam, he'll be glad he didn't leave, he acted like he already knew what things would be. Full of experience incomparable, offcourse, he's spent 2years here in Amadu's pen. I wish I knew, but how could I? When no one ever talked to me. I was all alone, all the while, hoping for someone to come end my mystery. Alas it came, i saw the duo moving around us, checking us out one after the other. They where men, looking for something, but I couldn't place what exactly it was that they needed. With so much expectation, I watched the scenes of how they sampled out all of my kinsmen, but…

"My Choice Death" -Sallah Special

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Seated with my legs crossed, eyes straight, mouth ruffled upwards, scratching my cheek to my under jaw, swinging from side to side, I was awaited Usman who promised to bring my share of sallah meat. If the next minute passed without him showing up, it will be exactly an hour since I’ve been waiting for him to arrive. With my eyes so tinted, nose blown out, knuckles cracking under the pressure of their neighbouring fingers, I awaited Usman like a man whose entitlements after retirement was being denied him. In the midst of my wait, I looked away and saw this view, a young man pulling a stubborn ram across the road. Quickly my thoughts ran like a flash, and the question popped into my subconscious; WHAT GOOD DOES SALAH DO THESE RAMS? I beheld the young man pull the ram like “Come here, you are beginning to waste my time” and I also saw the recusant ram draw back like “What good will you be doing me where you are taking me to?” T he tussle got so bad, the young man employed a whip beca…

Arik Air Incident - The Unseen Angle

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...That man at the centre of the Arik plane incident was/is mad, but as soon as he saw a higher altitude madness on display(The Turbulence), he bowed, submitted his madness, and started screaming "God Is Great". Passengers on board who couldn't comprehend his ordeal, took him for a Terrorist. Little did they know that he too was actually being terrorized by higher forces. The pilot, who quickly contacted the control towers, perhaps had thought the troubled man was an hijacker. But little did he too know that the man himself had been hijacked by higher degree hijackers. Behold "The Unseen Angle" The real story that couldn't be popularized as it beats the media eyes. LOL!!!!!!! -The Wordsmith.

The JOURNEY called WAITING

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...Like a discipline, this thing has got it rules, schedules, manuals and strategy. I tell you it isn't one of those things people find interesting. Its boring, Its killing especially when you don't know when its ending. It s WAITING, the very word that stands in between a promise and its fulfilling. And its WEIGHTY, if not handled the right way, it could crush the soul even before its circles are completed. Like I said before, its not one of those things anyone will find interesting, because its natural for a man to want to get instantly what he wants, ask or think. To face the reality, LIFE is a JOURNEY, and that journey is called WAITING. The preacher once told me, "Good things come to those who wait". I quickly summarized and rephrased, "Good things come to those who accept life as a journey, made up by a whole lot of waiting" life I must inform you, is ALL ABOUT WAITING, and the earlier you knew, the better prepared you'll be. A journey as uniq…

If Only You Saw TOMORROW

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..."Don't cry over yesterday, its gone, Don't lose sight of tomorrow,it will soon be here". For every today that is, a tomorrow for sure will be. But sadly, many have made tomorrow an impossibility by their combined actions of yesterday and today. I write to you with two inks today, like fighting one enemy with two different sword (the aim remains to overcome). You'll get to understand as we journey deep in this. ...Change they say is the only constant thing, this truth of which some have laid hold of, while some still live as though, all things will remain the same. I looked through the past as I searched history books, I carefully noted the numerous great inventions and ground breaking discoveries that made the headlines of those days. Great discoveries they were, the ultimate they seemed, at that point, man never wished for or saw anything better. I followed the progressions, then I saw that only a few years passed before the "Ultimate" which use…

Meet The 10 Extremely Weird Religions

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Permit me to publishe a variety of lists on strange religious practices, religions you never knew existed, and weird cults, but not a list of bizarre religions. This list is designed to fill the gap by discussing ten religions that most of us have not heard of (for good reason as you will see). Be sure to use the comments to tell us about any other bizarre religions and, especially, your own experiences of them. (10) Scientology Scientology has featured on a previous list, but if I didn’t include it here the comments would be inundated with “where’s scientology?” questions. The Church of Scientology is a cult created by L Ron Hubbard (Elron) in 1952 as an outgrowth of his earlier self-help system called Dianetics. The Church of Scientology holds that at the higher levels of initiation (OT levels) mystical teachings are imparted that may be harmful to unprepared readers. These teachings are kept secret from members who have not reached these levels. In the OT levels, Hubbard expl…

NAPTIP EVACUATES TRAFFICKED NIGERIAN GIRLS FROM COTE D'IVOIRE

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The National Agency for the Prohibition of Traffic in Persons and Other Related Matters, NAPTIP, has carried out a covert operation evacuating Ten Nigerian girls working as sex slaves in Abidjan, Cote d’ivoire. The girls who were brought into Abuja in two batches are from Edo State, Delta, Rivers and Benue States respectively, with Edo State topping the chart with six girls. The Executive Secretary of NAPTIP, Mrs. Beatrice Jedy-Agba disclosed that the operation which was intelligence driven was in collaboration with the regional bureau office of Interpol in Abidjan and an Abidjan based Non Governmental Organization, family Essan for Protection and Promotion of Human Rights, FEPDH. Mrs. Jedy-Agba who spoke while receiving the girls in NAPTIP Headquarters on Wednesday, sued for more intelligence sharing; co-operation and collaboration between West African Law Enforcement Agencies on trafficking in persons as a panacea to breaking the stranglehold of the criminal networks on the sc…

Meet The "Yahoo-Boys"

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Anyone with an inbox knows about "419 scams". They are the messages from mysterious strangers in possession of vast wealth and in need of a bank account to transfer it into. The senders are often assumed to be Nigerian, hence the name - 419 is a section of the Nigerian criminal code pertaining to fraud. Read more: "Happy spamiversary! Spam reaches 30" But what about the people behind the scams? They are known locally as "Yahoo Boys", a nod to their preference for Yahoo email accounts. Journalist Sarah Lacy tracked a few down and reported that times are hard, in part because westerners have become suspicious of emails that offer them massive lottery wins. Yet, beyond the occasional encounter with an intrepid journalist, we know little about a group of people who seem intent on trying to scam the entire planet. Thanks to Joshua Oyeniyi Aransiola, a sociologist at Obafemi Awolowo University in Ile-Ife, Nigeria, the 419ers are now a little less mysteriou…

The Nigerian Lesbian World -(An Article For Change)

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he African society views same-sex relationships as repulsive. Yet in Nigeria, homosexuals live among us. A few hide their status from the world’s prying eyes, while the majority however do not care. Some of them take Ruth Olurounbi through their worlds, insisting that they have been unfairly judged and misunderstood. Her report: Temitope Ali (not her real name), became a lesbian at age 15 during her secondary school days at a girls only boarding school. She was sent to the boarding school because ‘it was the in thing back then’, she said. Besides, a boarding school was an avenue for self discipline and self development in the arts of felinity, among others. Ali said, looking back, being a lesbian was something she couldn’t have imagined herself being, considering that she was from a devoted Muslim home which frowns against same sex relationships. “In fact, having heterosexual sex before marriage is something that is strictly frowned on my religion. So, becoming a lesbian is something…

Expect Food Scarcity In Some Parts of The Country - PDP Spokesman

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"Its high time we stocked our barns with tubbers of yams, and our silos with grains, because there's food scarcity looming in the air. Since the recent devastation by flood of major farming settlements in the country, food production has reduced to an all-time low state, due to the washing away of several farmlands and existing crops. Its no surprise that this warning is coming at this time, Nigerians had better prepared for the coming scarcity as we hope and pray the rains stop coming down heavily, and the R.Niger stops over flowing its boundaries." Courtesy : The Wordsmith. Here's what the PDP has to say about it: The ruling Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) yesterday warned that, in no distant time, food scarcity would hit some parts of the country. PDP in a communique issued by its National Publicity Secretary Chief Olisa Metuh, said Nigerians must know that flooding was a global phenomenon. The statement reads in part: “PDP has commended the President for the…

ALUU

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Following the sad events which occurred on the 5th day of October 2012 at Aluu community in Rivers State, Nigeria, where 4 innocent Students of the university of Portharcort, Nigeria were gruesomely murdered and thereafter set ablaze for allegedly stealing laptops and phones, a new word has now been added to the Nigerian vocabulary ; "Aluu". Aluu (Adjective) : Wicked, Callous, Brutal, Barbaric, In-humane, Devilish, Blood thirsty. Example : Come on man, don't be so aluu! Aluu (Noun) : A person whose thoughts are evil, animalistic, evil and barbaric. Aluu (Verb) : To murder, kill for no just cause. The newly introduced word "Aluu" can be used in a sentences like the bellow; *)That young man sitting in the corner is aluu, the earlier we left this place, the better for us. Create more sentences here!

When Life Was Simple

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…I miss the days when live was simple, when I didn't have to think of what to eat, what to wear, what to speak, nor what to do, and everything went easy. It never used to matter whether I knew what I was doing, all that matters was that I was active, alive and doing something. I close my eyes and imagine those good simple days and wish things remained the way they were, but quickly open my eyes to reality, to who I am today. its hard to swallow, am grown and have lost my innocence, lost my dependence, lost all the bliss I used to enjoy as dividends of my ignorance. I miss the days when life was simple, when I'll do the worse and everyone will say "Allow him, he's only a kid". What immunity! I miss being immune. I miss those days when live was simple, when I never used to know the distance of where I went, all because I was siting comfortably on somebody's back, then, a 10 kilometre walk and a 50 never use to make to me any difference. I miss the days when li…

There Was A Country (The Book Review)

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History of Biafra by Chinua Achebe - (Review) Achebe: an exhortation to better governance. No writer is better placed than Chinua Achebe to tell the story of the Nigerian Biafran war from a cultural and political perspective. Yet, apart from an interview with Transition magazine in 1968 and a book of Biafran poems, Nigeria's most eminent novelist has kept a literary silence about the civil war in which he played a prominent role – until now. In his engrossing new memoir, There Was A Country, Achebe, now 81, finally speaks about his life during the conflict that nearly tore Nigeria apart in the late 60s. In many ways, the early part of Achebe's life mirrors the story of early Nigeria. Nicknamed "Dictionary", Achebe was a gifted Igbo student and enthusiastic reader, a member of the "Lucky Generation" of young students who rubbed shoulders at top institutions under the tutelage of Oxbridge colonials. They were effortlessly absorbed into the media, industry a…

What Next?

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Show me the man who's contented with what he's got and doesn't want more, and I'll show you a man lying in a coffin. The wants and needs of man are so insatiable and inexhaustible, and the realisation of one dream one births the question "What Next?". No matter how high a goal you set for yourself, No matter how tall an ambition you're nursing, No matter how unbelievable the dream you've got, No matter how unthinkable the vision you see, The day you lay hold of it, you'll get to confirm my paradox that ; THERE'S NOTHING LIKE SATISFACTION. It defies logic to know that the word satisfaction never existed in the dictionary of mankind, as the poise to get more always override his sense of satisfaction and contentment. Even at the peak of his career, he wants more, he wants to try something else, he wants to be something new, he just never gets enough. Don't get things twisted here, I'm not condemning who we are, follow me carefully and s…

More On The Adamawa Massacre

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Nigerian soldiers moved house to house on Wednesday in an urgent bid to hunt down attackers responsible for the massacre of 40 people who were shot or had their throats slit in a student housing area. The raid in the early hours of Tuesday near a polytechnic university shook the town of Mubi, located in Nigeria's volatile northeast, where Islamist extremist group Boko Haram has carried out scores of previous attacks. Last week in Mubi, Nigeria's military conducted a high-profile raid targeting the group, killing a senior Boko Haram figure and arresting 156 suspected members. Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan called the gruesome off-campus attack "sad and shocking" but its motives remained unclear, with some officials suggesting the massacre may have been linked to a recent student election. Jonathan has ordered Nigeria's security agencies to investigate, his spokesman Reuben Abati told journalists. Police have given an official death toll of 25, saying at lea…